The place was cold, and the wind is still. I am standing on my favorite place, the rooftop of the university building. There was no sun yet, and everything was quiet as the ocean sleeping. My life used to be this quiet, so mundane that I almost hate it. Now, even though my feet begun to feel numbed by the cold stone on where I was standing, I now admitted that I craved for this stillness, the ordinariness of life.
However, I never regretted the things that had happened. I’d never regretted the wishes that I had made. And I never regretted loving him.
I knew that it was foolish for me to say this, but even if I know who he really was and what his purpose of being here in advance, I would still love him and I would never change any course of events. For those events, no matter how made-up it was, were still the happiest moments in my life.
I slowly glanced around, memorizing the place that was already etched on my mind. Soon enough my eyes begun to water as memories flooded my mind, and I realized that I would miss everything no matter how ordinary it were.
I sighed. I know that whatever I wish now would be of no significance. It was too late.
My watch said it was ten minutes before four o’clock in the morning, and I would be turning 18 years old any moment now. It was better to end it now.
I took a little step forward; I could barely feel my feet.
As I looked up above, I saw the birds that accompany me now in my loneliness.
They seemed to be expecting death.
Ugh, this place is hot. I thought to myself. Wait a minute!
Slowly, I opened my eyes, half-expecting to see the sun directly above me. But there was none. Instead, I saw a clear blue sky with huge clouds ahead.
What do you call those clouds? I suddenly thought. Cumulonimbus?
“Nah. Doesn’t matter,” I said as I stood up on where I was lying.
The ground was very parched and hot, and I felt the sweat slowly trickling at my back.
I looked at my surroundings, straining my eyes to see beyond the horizon, but there was no one in sight, not even a sight of a nearby hut or even an animal. I continued walking, following the trail before me and wondering where this would lead me.
I wonder where I am now. How did I get here? I thought.
I raked my mind of the past things that had happened to me to explain this. But I couldn’t remember.
Why am I here?
Do I have some sort of amnesia? I tried to think of my personal details. Name? Sarah. Age? 17. My parents? Yeah I remember them. In fact I could remember anything, except… Except how on earth I got here!
“Sarah, don’t panic!” I reminded myself.
Just continue walking.
I rubbed my forehead from the sweat that was starting to form. Then I noticed something, My eyes! I glanced again around me and noticed that everything was clearer even if I’m not wearing any glasses!
This must be a dream!
I looked at my hands and counted the fingers one by one. Left: five; Right: five. No missing. No deformation.
“Well, this reality check always failed anyway,” I told to myself.
So I started to do another reality check, I pushed my forefinger to my palm. I’m fully expecting that my finger would go right through my palm. But it did not.
“That’s weird. This never failed before.” I stood there for a moment, looking at my hands.
There is something wrong in here.
“Of course, there is something wrong because I’m in a dream! Yes, I’m in a dream, and I’m fully lucid. So what, if the reality checks didn’t work? The important thing is that I’m aware! Hmmm, let me see. What do I wanted to do in this dream?”
I decided to fly. So, I jumped like what I always do in my past lucid dreams. But I just quickly landed back on the ground.
This can’t be, there’s no gravity in dreams.
My heart started to pound, for some reason, I felt so uneasy. If this isn’t a dream, what is this?
I continued anxiously walking to the seemingly endless path before me, until I finally reached the valley between the hills.
Then I saw him.
And suddenly, I felt a peaceful feeling beyond words. It was a very familiar peaceful feeling, but I couldn’t point out the last time I felt this.
He was there sitting at the bottom of the nearest hill, wearing all white, and brown sandals. He looks stunningly perfect. His image was an epitome of a perfectly calm and relaxed state.
He looks familiar.
He stood up when he saw me.
“Sarah,” he said. And his voice was unexplainably beautiful and soothing. I hoped that he would just utter my name over and over again.
He smiled to me as if reading my thoughts, and I instinctively smiled back. But then for a moment I saw something in his eyes, it was an undeniable sadness. A deep sadness, that I almost felt it on a soul level.
Then suddenly, he averted his gaze, and when he looked back at me, the sadness was gone.
“We have to go,” he said, turning his back to me.
“Go where?” I asked, confused, afraid.
He looked back at me, and I saw again that sad smile. “Don’t worry; I’ll do everything to protect you,” he said. “I just hope you didn’t do it. But, don’t worry, I am to blame.”
Then he grabbed my hand and we started walking slowly. I couldn’t understand what he meant by what he said, I wanted to ask but I was afraid that I would see again his sadness.
Silence filled the air.
While we were walking, I felt a familiar feeling like this had happened before. Like at some point of my life, I had already walked hand in hand with this beautiful being.
“I was just wondering…,” I started, “Who are you?”
He took a halt, and looked at me, he was confused.
“What do you mean, Sarah?” he said.
“I mean, who—are—you? Sorry, but I really don’t know you, and I don’t mean that in a harsh way, but I just don’t really know you or why I’m here. I don’t even know why I trust you. And I’m wondering why we’re walking here, hand in hand, and it felt…it felt too familiar.”
“Sarah, I’m…I’m Ethan.”
“Ethan. So, where are we? And where are we headed?”
“W—we are at the angel’s valley and we’re headed to the Judgment Hall.”
“The Angel’s valley,” I repeated, trying to digest every word.
“Yes, this is where guardians wait for their d—departed charge.”
Departed charge. It took awhile for me to understand what he meant by that. He was still looking at me, and his face showed genuine concern.
“Oh,” I finally took courage to say, “You mean, I’m d—dead.”
It was an unfathomable realization. All I thought, just awhile ago, was just I’m dreaming. He did not say anything; he just continued looking at me as if he himself doesn’t know what to say about all this things. Then, I felt his cool hands tighten around mine. And a wave of calmness passed through my whole being. It’s unexplainable.
“T—then why did I die?” I said calmly.
He squinted his eyes, deliberating whether it was right to tell me about it or not.
After some time, he finally spoke.
“Because of me.”
“You? You mean you killed me?!” I was bewildered. Normal reasoning told me that I should take my hand away from him and run as fast as I could. But I couldn’t. And I wouldn’t. For some reason, I trusted him.
“No,” he said, smiling a little. “You took your own life b—because of me.”
“B—but, I don’t know you.”
Then he looked away, and I knew in my heart that I said a wrong thing.
Who is this guy? I thought. And as if reading my mind, he turned to me with a look that could crush my soul and whole being. It was very heartbreaking, and I could felt it all.
“I am your angel.”
I guessed, I stared at him for a full minute without blinking or moving any muscles. I knew he was waiting for me—what I would tell, or what would be my reaction to this. But this time, I don’t know how to react. Death took me by surprise but it wouldn’t budge me that easily. But an angel? The angel that I wished for all my life, that stubborn wish I plead every night to God.
He is my angel. The one.
Then he pulled me close to him and hugged me tight. His skin felt cold against mine. Everything about him has this unexplainable cold yet calming presence, even as I breathe in his scent, I could remember the first time I had looked at a snow.
“It’s all my fault,” he then said. “I shouldn’t have left you, or maybe I shouldn’t have appeared to you in the first place. I’m sorry. I didn’t know that it would come to this. I didn’t know that you would take a suicide. I thought you were strong enough. I thought you didn’t love me that much, I knew you love me, but it never crossed my mind that you would take your life because of this. I’m sorry. I have hurt you so much that you chose to forget everything about me even in death. I’m sorry.”
“I love you Sarah.”
Then in an instant, everything turned black. A swarm of memories flooded through me. Memories of love and happiness. Memories of him.
No, I don’t wish to forget those.
I felt a strong gush of wind around me, and I was being pulled and sucked below. I was FALLING, and I was falling very fast.
Then I heard from a distant the familiar sturdy flapping of wings.
And I knew everything would be fine.
Sorry, I really loved fantasy romance genre, especially those that includes angels and vampires. I just can’t help it, whenever I write stories, I found myself drifting to these kinds of plots and characters. This was almost similar to one of the scenes I’m planning to incorporate to my unfinished novel (I wonder if I would ever finished it).
By the way, I counted and it was 1,728 words all in all, just a little bit more than the required 1500 words.
I hope that anyone would read this story would enjoy it, as this story is a very important part of me.
Any comments and criticisms are appreciated.